A sardar went to Pizza Hut.
There he ordered a Pizza.
The Waiter asked him:
Sir shell I cut it into 4 pieces or 8 pieces.
Sardar replied:
O 4 hi le aa yaar,
8 to nahin khaye jayein gay
Monday, June 16, 2014
A Sardar Went To Pizza Hut.
A sardar went to Pizza Hut.
There he ordered a Pizza.
The Waiter asked him:
Sir shell I cut it into 4 pieces or 8 pieces.
Sardar replied:
O 4 hi le aa yaar,
8 to nahin khaye jayein gay
Change
Change will not come if we wait for
some other person or some other time
we are the ones we've been waiting for
we are the change that we seek.
Happiness can be found
Happiness can be found
even in the darkest of times.
if one only remember to
turn on the light.
Teacher and pappu
Teacher: What is the name of the capital city of Punjab ?
Pappu: Amritsar.
Teacher: Pappu, you are wrong, you need to focus more on your studies.
Pappu: Please madam, can I ask you a few questions.
Teacher: Yes, go ahead.
Pappu: Do you know Jeeto ?
Teacher: No.
Pappu: Do you know Preeto ?
Teacher: No.
Pappu: Do you know Banto?
Teacher: (Angry) Hell no! Who are all these people and why do you ask ?
Pappu: Teacher, you need to Focus more on your husband.
Sunday, June 15, 2014
My love
My love is of a birth as rare
As 'tis for object strange and high:
It was begotten by Despair
Upon Impossibility.
Magnanimous Despair alone
Could show me so divine a thing,
Where feeble Hope could ne'er have flown
But vainly flapped its tinsel wing.
And yet I quickly might arrive
Where my extended soul is fixed
But Fate does iron wedges drive,
And always crowds itself betwixt.
For Fate with jealous eye does see
Two perfect loves, nor lets them close:
Their union would her ruin be,
And her tyrranic power depose.
And therefore her decrees of steel
Us as the distant Poles have placed
(Though Love's whole world on us doth wheel)
Not by themselves to be embraced,
Unless the giddy heaven fall,
And earth some new convulsion tear;
And, us to join, the world should all
Be cramped into a planisphere.
As lines (so loves) oblique may well
Themselves in every angle greet:
But ours so truly parallel,
Though infinite, can never meet.
Therefore the love which us doth bind,
But Fate so enviously debars,
Is the conjunction of the mind,
And opposition of the stars.
by Andrew Marvell
Funny Sardar
Bus conductor: Ticket, ticket
Sardar: Give two tickets
Conductor: Why two?
Sardar: If I lose one, another will be there
Conductor: What if you lose both?
Sardar: No problem, I have pass...
Sardar: Give two tickets
Conductor: Why two?
Sardar: If I lose one, another will be there
Conductor: What if you lose both?
Sardar: No problem, I have pass...
Santa Singh: Banta, bole toh yeh Ford kya hai?
Banta: Are, woh to gaadi hai.
Santa: Toh phir, yeh Oxford kya hai?
Banta: Are bhai, woh toh simple hai bhai, Ox mane Bael, Ford mane gaadi. Oxford bole toh Baelgaadi.
International Bhikhari
Bhikhari: 100 Rs dedo bhai
Person: Arre.. tu bhikh maang raha hai ki majak kar raha hai.
Bhikhari: Bhikh maang raha hoon.
Person (angrily): tu pagal to nahi hua jo 100 Rs maang raha hai.
Bhikhari: Main ek senior bhikhari hoon.
Mera upgradation hua hai.
Pehle main 5 saal Boriwali station pe 10 Rs maangta tha.
Usake baad main 5 saal Dadar station pe 20 Rs ki bhikh maangata tha.
Abhi Colaba mein mera transfer hua hai.
Jara mere status ka to khayal karo!
This year’s election is a Bachelor’s Party
This year’s election is a Bachelor’s Party
Narendra Modi,
Rahul Gandhi
Jayalalitha
Mayawati
Mamta Bannerji
Anna Hazare….
Desh ka bhavishya keval Kunwara Vyakti hi badal sakta hai…
Kyunki… Shaadi-Shuda insaan to saala TV ka channel bhi apni marzi se nahin badal sakta!!
Gazal By Indian AAM AADMI
| Gazal By Indian AAM AADMI | ||||
| Yeh Anna hazare be le lo | ||||
| Yeh Lokpall be le lo | ||||
| Bhale cheen lo Hum se Bipasha Basu | ||||
| Magar Hum Ko Lauta do | ||||
| Woh Kimti Purani | ||||
| Woh Atta | ||||
| Woh Gas | ||||
| Woh Bijli | ||||
| Woh Pani | ||||
| Badi Meharbaani…! | ||||
| Badi Meharbaani…! | ||||
Saturday, June 14, 2014
Hello
| Boy: Hello, Pammi darling… kaisi ho? | |||||
| Girl: Who’s this? | |||||
| Boy: Tera aashiq hun; jaaneman !! | |||||
| Girl: Tu Bunty hai na. | |||||
| Boy: Yes; but how do you know ? | |||||
| Girl: Tu Bansilal ka beta hai na. | |||||
| Boy: Yes but how you know me?? | |||||
| Girl: Tu Ramlal ka pota hai na….. | |||||
| Boy: Yes !! but jaanu, tumhe ye sab kaise pata? | |||||
| Girl: Bunty Haramkhor; kutte, mai teri Maa hun!! | |||||
| Tune ‘Pummi’ ko nahi, ‘Mummi’ ko phone lagaya hai!! | |||||
Whom u like more muma or papa
| Papa- Whom u like more muma or papa? | ||||||
| Kid- Both | ||||||
| Papa- No tell me 1? | ||||||
| Kid- Both | ||||||
| Papa- If i go to America & Ur mother go to Paris.. Whr will u go? | ||||||
| Kid- Paris | ||||||
| Papa- It means u like ur mother? | ||||||
| Kid- No, coz paris is beautiful than America | ||||||
| Papa- If i go to paris & Ur mother goes to america so Whr will u go? | ||||||
| Kid- America | ||||||
| Papa- why? | ||||||
| Kid- Paris to ghum aaye na papa | ||||||
| Papa- Jaa be Maa key Chamche jaa school jaa! | ||||||
Jinki maa nahi hoti unke baccho ko dua kaun deta
Kisi ne mujh se pucha..
ki jinki maa nahi hoti unke baccho ko dua kaun deta hai..
Maine kaha ki:
Koi jheel agar sookh bhi jaye to mitti se nami nahi jati..
isi tarah maa marne ke baad bhi apni aulad ko dua deti rehti hai.
Friday, June 13, 2014
Natural tips for hair loss
1. Hot oil treatments: Take any natural oil - olive, coconut, canola - and heat it up so that it is warm, but not too hot. Massage it gently into your scalp. Put on a shower cap and leave it on for an hour, then shampoo your hair.
2. Natural juices: You can rub your scalp with either garlic juice, onion juice or ginger juice. Leave it on overnight and wash it thoroughly in the morning.
3. Get a head massage: Massaging your scalp for a few minutes daily will help stimulate circulation. Good circulation in the scalp keeps hair follicles active. Circulation may be improved through massage by using a few drops of lavender or bay essential oil in an almond or sesame oil base.
4. Antioxidants: Apply warm green tea (two bags brewed in one cup of water) on your scalp and leave this mixture on for an hour and then rinse. Green tea contains antioxidants which prevent hair loss and boost hair growth.
5. Practice meditation: Believe it or not, most of the times, the root cause for hair loss is stress and tension. Meditation can help in reducing that and restore hormonal balance.
मुझे पुकार लो
इसीलिए खड़ा रहा कि तुम मुझे पुकार लो!
ज़मीन है न बोलती न आसमान बोलता,
जहान देखकर मुझे नहीं जबान खोलता,
नहीं जगह कहीं जहाँ न अजनबी गिना गया,
कहाँ-कहाँ न फिर चुका दिमाग-दिल टटोलता,
कहाँ मनुष्य है कि जो उमीद छोड़कर जिया,
इसीलिए खड़ा रहा कि तुम मुझे पुकार लो
इसीलिए खड़ा रहा कि तुम मुझे पुकार लो!
तिमिर-समुद्र कर सकी न पार नेत्र की तरी,
विनष्ट स्वप्न से लदी, विषाद याद से भरी,
न कूल भूमि का मिला, न कोर भोर की मिली,
न कट सकी, न घट सकी विरह-घिरी विभावरी,
कहाँ मनुष्य है जिसे कमी खली न प्यार की,
इसीलिए खड़ा रहा कि तुम मुझे दुलार लो!
इसीलिए खड़ा रहा कि तुम मुझे पुकार लो!
उजाड़ से लगा चुका उमीद मैं बहार की,
निदघ से उमीद की बसंत के बयार की,
मरुस्थली मरीचिका सुधामयी मुझे लगी,
अंगार से लगा चुका उमीद मै तुषार की,
कहाँ मनुष्य है जिसे न भूल शूल-सी गड़ी
इसीलिए खड़ा रहा कि भूल तुम सुधार लो!
इसीलिए खड़ा रहा कि तुम मुझे पुकार लो!
पुकार कर दुलार लो, दुलार कर सुधार लो!
By Harivansh Rai Bachchan
Thursday, June 12, 2014
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fomous quotes
''Those sound like the three
best answers i've ever heard
on this show ever though it's
the first ever of this show!''
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